From the mouth of Troy:

My alarm clock goes off at the worst times... usually when I'm asleep.

From the mouth of Troy:

The bullying in public school has gotten so bad that we decided to home bully our kid.

From the mouth of Troy:

I'm a good looking man when the lights are out as long as you don't touch me and I don't speak.

From the mouth of Troy:

My clothes aren't a statement. I simply use them to cover my genitalia. It's a law you know.